La tahzan, innallaha ma'ana.

Hi assalamualaikum uguys.

Sucks isnt it not being able to see each other on daily basis? Even sucks knowing that that would be no sleepover this time around on that school holiday, which we doesnt even have any school holidays anymore after this, except what they called that, ah, semester break.


What an adult word to use, semester break. Lol. But thats what we are going to be anytime soon right? Two or three years top from now? Adults. Oh my God, such a long way to go dont you think?

But here we are now: spm-burden-free bunch of people, I seriously sincerely didnt know that that is a possible thing hahahha. My imagination runs too wild sometimes. I seriously thought that Id never make it to sit for the spm examination. Heck even after Ive finished sitting for spm, I thought I wouldnt make it to take the result with you guys. Maybe I'm a pessimist, but I think in the end Im just being realistic. Who knows what couldve happened in the future dont u think?

Our friendship might end anytime soon, whose to say it wouldnt?
No one knows.

But of course, one could only hope for the better, with the guidance from Allah.

Sometimes I feel really ashamed talking about religion stuff, as if I'm that religious but it needed to be said, it needed to be hold on to, truthfully sometimes its the only thing that keeps me going. That makes me strong enough to survive another day. Allah.

Befriending me, I'm sure uguys know how ugly I can be at times, I'm glad Allah still let me keep u guys by my side, but yeah, I can be really really ugly, inside and out. But He will always be there, always be and has always been. Its just, we just need time to see that.

Im sure u guys agree that this past few weeks has been hard on all of us, in our own way. Sometimes we comfort each other in the midst of our own hardship, see how great that turns out? That is one of Allah's promise actually, we make other people happy and we will be happy too, in fact we might even be happier than we used to be.

I too dont have any wisdom words to share or great advice to give on how to deal with the hard stuff in your life right now, but I hope if any of you need a pair of ear and a set of eyes to hear and read your rants, I'm here. I might not be right on time, but Im still here. This is an offer that I hope you guys would take, for this offer has no expiration date.

Thanks guys, I love you. Ishtakhtu ilaiki.

-book

Decisions, decisions...

                               

Assalamualaikum, people.

 I really miss you guys. I miss us being together, being complete.

First and foremost, please agree with me that getting into college or university is really hard.

Thank you.

So I'm writing because I really feel like I'm stuck between choices. Even when it seems like there are only two options, that's not the reality of it. The reality is that one choice would lead to several other choices, and both of those options have this effect.

Too many things that I'm not fully mentally able to handle.

Each with their own pros and cons.

I just feel really stuck and basically I'm just vomiting out my rants all over this post, not that there are a lot cause I think I'm too mentally exhausted to even rant about anything.

I kenot lah.  I just kenot.

So the above schools are what I'm stuck between. It is expected of me too choose wisely. And quickly. (cry, wail, lament)

Whatever choice I make, I would have to deal with the consequences. 

Everything we do ada akibat, it's just life. I should really learn to differentiate between redha and giving up. I should really learn a lot of things. Things I'm afraid to learn, cause then I would be an adult, knowing all those things. 

The truth is that I am afraid.

The truth is that I am not ready.

The truth is that I am going to have to do it anyway.

                                                                                                                                            ~ crust

                                                                                                                 

Let's all walk forward and strive for a better future; both for this world and the here after.

Wake up every morning and thank God for letting you experience one more day in the gorgeous world He created.

Because You Matter

I am not certain where to start and how will this end but I will give my best.

Assalammualaikum lil boxes. I miss all of u so much and it feels different here without all the people I care and held dear in my petite heart. It seems that Aida have reached the limit of her sanity in the absence of her mobile phone while I was not here. xD regardless i still love ya.

So, u seemed eager to hear how I have been doing these few weeks. Well, the weather is the same as Malaysia....

...

That was an unfinished draft I had written a few weeks ago. Why had I only ended there? Why didn't I post it? Well, partly because I don't know what to write and I felt as if it was not entirely from my heart. I was not ready yet at the moment i guess.

I'm writing here today cause I finally have a day that I decided to be a completely couch potato. Nesting more fat in my stomach and leaving an aggregate load of homework on my table to collect dust. I'm in the living room now, sitting on a chair, typing while hugging my left leg close, eating nutella from a knife (table knife ofc) and listening to my Michael Buble track.

Are you here with me yet?

I'm feeling very content at this moment of time. There are ,of course, a considerable amount of obstacle that should hinder me from feeling happy and content but I had decided to not let those feeling narrow my vision from seeing the bigger picture where it shows that there are actually good things that happen to me and I'm grateful that those things are in my life as well.

 Missing my friends, my family and the environment I was in while in Malaysia. Feeling like a total gijin at time and just so empty. I fail and I fall but I just have to talk to myself, encourage myself that everything is okay, there have got to be something better around that boulder that's stopping you. You have got to stand up. Patience is the key.

So, it's okay to cry; to throw a tantrum like a 5 year old cause let's just face it. We are not strong. However, just as Kelly Clarkson had said before in her song, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. We can't wait, sometimes, for a hand to reach out to us in order to get back on your feet. We, ourselves, have to bush off those little dust of misery and pat our selves while saying you are going to be fine.

Nevertheless, we are humans. Know that there are people who love you for you and don't be afraid to lean onto their shoulder. Keeping it to yourself will destroy you from the inside; spreading like a virus from your mental state to your physical state. Pick up that mobile phone or go knock on that someone's door and cry. Break down and bawl your heart out. I'm sorry cause I can't be there for you guys but know that I support you MKKs, Otromeru, Dynamic Girls (hopefully you guys have't forgotten this) and last but surely not least my betistil selfie partner. My soul is there with you. Catching your every tear you shed. Love you people okay and I believe that you guys will find a way to walk around every boulder that's in your way. 

Please don't think that you will disturb me if you call and please, please, please don't think that the feeling that's causing you misery should be nothing compared to what others are feeling cause your feeling matters and if that's how your feeling, I'm always here to hear you out. So, please don't hide and runway. I'm here.

xoxo, 
Cookie

Grief-week? Or month? Can I join?

Hi assalamualaikum. Its me, Book again. Haha, again.


So em the moment I clicked at the posts button, I saw quite a number of interesting drafts, which I kinda know whom it is from, Cookie you're the culprit is it hahahaha



Ladies, SPM's result has alr been announced. For me, the high lasted only for what em three hours? After that all I could do is cry and mourning for you girls. Crust and Booty, I really hope you know that I was in fact preparing to cheer for you girls, it never crossed my mind that my name would be announced instead. I can never know how crushed you are right now, even if your mouth and fingers keep denying it, but please know that I'm here, shoulders and ears ready for your rants or tears.

Please dont push me away, what good is my result if my loved ones are not even there to celebrate it with me..

I am well aware that each of your world does not revolved around me but I am as your best friend demand to know whats happening to you girls. Please talk to me.

It seems that I've prepared myself for the expected event; the event that seemed likely to happen, but not for this one. Not for this kind. So please I'm begging you, please talk to me.

Love, Book.